Why?

Why do I struggle every year when it starts turning fall? It doesn't make sense. The summer this year was brutal at best and yet something happens in my brain when it starts turning colder and the feel of Fall is in the air. I just knew it wouldn't bother me this year, but here I am once again in this funk dreading the colder weather. I cannot recall any type of trauma inflicted on me this time of year, so why? My Dad died in the summer, my sister in the winter and my Mom in the Spring. This is really the only time of year I haven't experienced a major loss. Why does contentment seem so far away at times? Why does it seem like there is this giant gaping hole in me that I am constantly trying to fill with stuff? I know this will pass. It always does. I know I have so much to be thankful for.